The life of a not so average girl doing not so average things.

Archive for March, 2013

Spring Break and the Aftermath

Today was the first day back from Spring Break and it was REALLY long. This is the beginning of the end and every minute of every day I am thinking about what exactly that means and the new challenges I am and will soon face. Yes, this was the first day of the second half of my last semester as an under-graduate!

Spring Break was awesome. I had a birthday(WHOO!). I had an interview(YIKES! and WHOO!). I had a major panic attack(WHOO…what?!).

No, it was relaxing and calming and the only reason I had a meltdown on Saturday, was because now I can literally do nothing about seminary, except wait to see if I get accepted. I got to spend a lot of time with my sisters which was wonderful. Not as much time with my brother, but he was  off having grand adventures of his own. I got to spend quite a bit of time with my grandparents and some other family members as well, which was great! I even got to see sonogram pictures of Junebug, my cousin’s baby. 🙂

Now I am back, not entirely willingly, and it is crunch time! My first ever online class started today and I’m pretty anxious about it. It’s taught by my favorite professor, but I’m nervous about keeping up with the amount of reading necessary. SAI elections are right around the corner, which makes me super excited! Getting to pass the gavel on will be rewarding and take a HUGE weight off my shoulders! Speaking of SAI, initiation is Friday! Whoo! We’ll have 8 new initiates. I’m really proud of them and excited for them to officially be sisters. That being said, I speak for like eight pages in that ceremony and I’m nervous about forgetting lines!

I did get to start the week off right by working with my dear friend, JerseyGirl, in the library this evening. She is one of the most exciting things about the prospect of going to Princeton. We talk about our lives together a lot. Haha! It’s kind of adorable. 🙂 Don’t sweat it, she’s married. 😉 JerseyGirl is the perfect name for her, because she lives in New Jersey when she’s not at school here with me, but she is not ANYTHING like what probably came to mind when you read that name.

Anyway, I read this little tidbit in the textbook for my online class and found it quite interesting and relate-able:

Family research is quite clear about the systemwide effects of destructive marital
conflict. First, negative conflict between the parents reduces the family’s network of
friends and creates more loneliness (Jones 1992). Conflict between the parents tends to
both change the mood of household interactions and shift the parents’ attention to the
negative behaviors of their children (Jouriles and Farris 1992). Parental conflict has a
direct negative impact on the children. Communication patterns between fathers and
their young adult children seem to have a circular relationship—the young adults treat
their fathers the way they were treated (Dumlao and Botta 2000). Conflict between parents predicts well-being of the children, with more conflict associated with maladaptive
behavior on the part of the children (Dunn and Tucker 1993; Garber 1991; Grych and
Fincham 1990; Jouriles, Bourg, and Farris 1991). Finally, the effects of destructive con-
flict patterns suggest that “ongoing conflict at home has a greater impact on adolescent
distress and symptoms than does parental divorce” (Jaycox and Repetti 1993, 344). Parents who either avoid conflict or engage in negative cycles of mutual damage directly
influence the children’s subsequent lives. A modest relationship exists between mothers
who avoid conflict and their daughters’ marital satisfaction (VanLear 1992). On the
other end of the continuum, children who are exposed to harsh discipline practices at
home (which coincide with a negative and hostile relationship between the parents)
are more at risk for aggression, hyperactivity, and internalizing by withdrawing, having
somatic complaints, and experiencing depressive symptoms (Jaycox and Repetti 1993).
The family effects also reach beyond the immediate environment. One study demonstrated that children from high-conflict homes had much stronger negative reactions
while watching a video of angry adults than did children from low-conflict homes
(El-Sheikh 1994).

I’m not saying I’m screwed up because my parents fight/fought a lot, althought that may very well be the case, I just thought it was an interesting correlation.

-Kay

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The Last Twelve Months

Today I got a short little email from The Director that had a whole lot packed into. The following is that correspondence.

The Director:

“one year ago I got this email….

—–Original Message—–

Mr. Rheingans,

I’m interested in applying for the internship program this summer, should my reference letters be sent in my email along with my application, or should they be emailed directly to you, or sent in by mail?

Thank you,

Kay

Me:
“It’s been a fantastic year. The people who I would define as “Family” has totally changed in that time. Thank you for opening your home and your hearts up to me. A lot of crappy things have happened in the last twelve months, but the people I met while in Wisconsin have helped me make it through and feel stronger and more connected to God through it all. I’m so very glad I applied and even more so that you and Sue chose me. 🙂 Now you’ll never get rid of me! Haha!

Thank you for everything, Ken.
Love,
Kay”
I don’t know if he was clearing out his email or if he went looking for it, but it meant a great deal that he would send me this email. Seven words and an ellipses that to anyone else would mean nothing, but to me it was a reminder of all that has happened in the last twelve months of my life. God has done so much. He has brought a great many people into my life in that short time, people who I now can’t imagine my life without. 🙂 I love them, each and every one. Thank you, Director, for allowing me to become a part of your family and vice verse. I can’t wait to visit again soon. 🙂
-Kay